They are tought to wait for their death...

I have been watching documentaries. The last one I watched was about the social care  houses in Bulgaria. Parents in these countries had abondend their chidlren, due to that they had different disabilites, such as being blind, having autism or not knowing how to talk. These children ended up at the houses. At these places the children became worse, most of them after a year became really crazy and got strong drugs so they would be quit and still. Due to the lack of nutrious food, many of them starved to death. Because they never got any stimulation what so ever, they often became violent, and never learnt how to speak or communicate, rather they self-abused themselves. It was also shown that they often had injuries, caused by getting abused by the staff. Almost all the girls at the house had lost their virginity to some male member of the staff.

So, how can these happen? Bulgaria is a country part of the European Union. This is not a unusual case, most social service houses in Bulgaria are like this, or worse. I am chocked, angry and wishing that I can do something about this right now, at this moment. After voluntering at Ivy Mount, I have the knowledge of how a good place for children with disabilities should be. Their goal was to prepar the children to be self-sufficient in the world. Well, as seen in Bulgaria, they are tought to wait for their death!

I want to change this! I am going to change this.

Here you can watch the documentary: Bulgaria’s Abandoned Children

Nessica

Memories, now and forever...

So, here are the photos from our wonderful trip in USA... They are though not in order!

 

Outside our beach house in Bethany. My mom, B, me, Tim, Phillip, Jen, Olivia and Andreas.. It is the last day, just before we went for breakfast.. Than we drove back to DC.

 

In a park in New Jersey!  

Hanging out at my sisters place, Elin, Mom and Momo doing some floor time..

At Portias and Phil, I am kicking my brother and Marias ass, at this game! :)

Me and my wonderful brother at a terrace at Kennedy theatre in DC!

And here we are again!

Andreas, Elin, Ryan and Tim spending time at Bethany Beach!

Me with my wonderful cousins Riley and B..

Making some art in the sand...

Hugging the last night at Bethany Beach!

Group-hug with my two Arizona-relatives..

My two cousins from Detroit!

Elin taking a nap on the plane!

Here we are after 12 hours on a plane...

Making some breakfast at our hostel in New York!

Barbeque at the beach in Manhatten!

Some nice police-officers we met in DC!

Resting outside the White House.

Enjoying watching Sweden beating USA!

Celebrating the victory when the land of meatballs won over the land of hamburgers, together with some guys from the land of champagne!

Love my Elin!

Having a picknic in DC with my sis

Poor Danny, getting forced to hug a crazy Swede!

And here is another one of the IKEA citizens!

Eating frozen yo, while waiting for the Harry Potter movie to start, and celebrating my brothers birthday at the same time.

Two of my favorite people in the world!

Mom, singing happy birthday on the streets of DC, to my brother.
Ryan is though escaping from the singing!

Elin, sitting in the famous yellow school-buss of America!

Phillip, looking just wonderful in Bethesda!

And here we are, the two most perfect humans in the world! ;)

Me, together with the two men in my life!

Some actors, performing at Kennedy theatre!

Happy hour, with the people we worked with at Ivy Mount!

Elin, drinking Margharitas!

My beloved cuz Riley...

It does not come any better then that!

At the bucket bar, drinking bucket cocktails!

Some hugging for the camera..

The two amazing girls!

Eventually, after a lot of travelling, and meeting family, friends, strangers, and so on.... 

We decided to do what we know best. Become the leaders, and run the country!

Nessica

And here is the end, or shall we say the beginning?

So, back in Sweden! I came home on tuesday, and had two days of relaxing in Gävle, before driving up to Urkult. Urkult is a festival were they play music from all over the world. It was wonderful! Knowing it was my last vacation , I did everything possible to enjoy it as much as I could. I laughed and danced through the whole weekend.

Today was the first day of seriousness. I payed all my bills, applied to the next course, organized with CSN, updated my CV and sent it off to some interesting job oppurtinities, and finally began the studying to my hall-exam. I know, I am pretty damn impressed of what I have accomplished today, knowing that I have not really done anything that has to do with stuff like this for almost two months. Well, I thought I should start out strong, and sort of set out the standard of the coming year.

As Elin has mentioned, coming back from a trip is always depressive. One has sort of been living in a dream-world, when traveling, so coming back to reality is kind of painful. Although, I feel filled with new energy and life could not be better. Everything is going on the right direction, and I have already began to plan my next trip. But for now, I am looking forward to begin school again, and stuff my brain with enormous amount of knowledge about how to become a world leader and save the world from itself!

Nessica

Home is where the heart is, and I bring my heart with me wherever I go.

I had an amazing month in USA, I couldn't have asked for a better trip. The way I see it, it was the perfect blend of experiences. We managed to do a lot of different things during these past weeks, some days were crazy, others were laidback, some days were serious, others were just filled with fun and games. Just as I wanted it to be. It was also the perfect blend of teamwork and individuality, thank you Nessica for that and for everything else :) I think it was a great thing that we gave each other the freedom to do whatever we wanted to do.

We've been back in Sweden for a couple of days now, and returning was hard, as usual. Me and Nessica had a smaller breakdown on Arlanda, we sat down on the sidewalk outside the entrance and cursed the feeling of being back... as Nessica expressed herself: I've been back in Sweden for 20 minutes and I feel... I just feel... I seriously feel that I need a vacation. The seriousity in her vocie made me laugh, but in the same time, I felt exactly the same way as her.

This is totally normal and something I have to accept about myself. This is the way I am. I'm not so good at acting happy when I'm not, so I just have to give myself some time, and sooner or later the feeling of hopelessness will be gone.

The good thing is that I lose all desire to do fun stuff, or to do anything at all, so taking care of boring stuff the first days weren't hard at all, casue there was nothing else I wanted to do anyway. I have now ordered my litterature for this autumn, I have payed my bills, I have enrolled the next course, I have applied for another year of borrowed money for my studies, everything is under control, except my inner chaos. But as the days go by, the pieces of whatever is me will fall into place again. I have had good moments too, like the surprise dinner my friends made for me, or like going alone in the car with Metallica on high volume. There are things I appreciate, I'm just not so good at showing it right now.

And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look
Behind from where we came
And go round and round and round in the circle game